1) Malware can change language settings to Swahili
2) Possible with IPTV exploit (tho why not open YT to Gigli)
3) Neutering pets and static cling are practically infeasible
4) Yes, freezing the screen, too easy
5) Erasing DVD-Rs require firmware mods to force laser to wipe it (hard)
6) Definitely, wipers wipe HDD and backups
7) Only if (relatives) triggered the virus too
8) Forwarding a warning mail to a large mailing list is bad practice < Warn them in person
9) Paint peeling off the walls isn't feasible
10) Keyboard sticky can only happen if it loads adult sites and they are left open
11) Poodle hickey, lol, it isn't rabies
12) If it gets to your bank site, yes it can invest in stocks
13) Mobile (and DSL) malware can sometimes call long distance
14) Clocks can be altered, it's just a setting
15) Clog a shower (lol no)
16) Give u a wedgie (lol no too)
17) Name change (idk)
18) Only if the pH is IoT controlled
19) Melting face not possible
20) Locking a connected iPod to one song (yes)
21) Autoplaying knock knoc jokes, possible and annoying
22) Changing attraction isn't that feasible even if someone tries in person
23) Definitely, identities and cards have been stolen regularly
24) Prank buying pink leotards is possible, but why(!)
25) Time and space rifts break physics
26) Twinkie wrappers only if it orders it (see 23) and everyone lazily eats and dumps it
27) malware infection can make you feel horrible, yes
28) Auto Emailing adult stuff (sometimes)
29) Yes, powering down the machine stops the malware for now
30) Sell the machine, don't drop it in a 43ft hole unless you wanna burn $$
31) Bury it, lol, what a funeral
32) Burning the clothes .... well, now you are wasting money like the virus